| Rank | Team | Captains | Spirit | Record | Pt. Diff. |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1st | Stanley Yelnats | n/a | 2-0 (1.000) | +10 | |
| 2nd | Party Barge | n/a | 2-0 (1.000) | +7 | |
| 3rd | Drinks Well | n/a | 2-0 (1.000) | +4 | |
| 4th | Big Gulps | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | +4 | |
| 5th | Zheng Da Nasty | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | +3 | |
| 6th | C̶o̶r̶o̶n̶a̶v̶i̶r̶u̶s̶ | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | 0 | |
| 7th | Micro Dab | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | -2 | |
| 8th | Wash Your Hands! | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | -4 | |
| 9th | Underpants Gnomes | n/a | 1-1 (.500) | -5 | |
| 10th | Gratuitous Party | n/a | 0-2 (.000) | -4 | |
| 11th | Washington Heist | n/a | 0-2 (.000) | -5 | |
| 12th | ______ Evolved | n/a | 0-2 (.000) | -8 |